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In addition to his EMS career, Ken has over 25 years of Academic Medical Center Hospital Administration experience in surgical specialty, primary care, Emergency Department and practice management. Ken has served on two National Board of Directors; MGMA’s Ambulatory Care Administration and the Association of Family Practice Administrators.
Effective Communication
Today, technology has required that our communication skills be sharper and unfortunately, accomplished using less less words. (The 40-character text message comes to mind). However, in order to be an effective communicator, one needs to become a better listener. Listening helps us solve problems, ensure understanding, resolve conflicts, and improve accuracy.
Here are 10 tips to help you develop effective listening skills.
Step 1: Face the speaker and maintain eye contact.
Talking to someone while they scan the room, or study a computer screen, or gaze out the window is like trying to hit a moving target. How much of the person’s divided attention you are actually getting?
Step 2: Be attentive, but relaxed.
Now that you have made eye contact, relax. You do not have to stare fixedly at the other person. You can look away now and then and carry on like a normal person. The important thing is to be attentive. The dictionary says that to “attend” another person means to:
Step 3: Keep an open mind.
Listen without judging the other person or mentally criticizing what is said. Let the speaker finish their thoughts. Listen without jumping to conclusions.
Step 4: Listen to the words and try to picture what the speaker is saying.
Allow your mind to create a mental model of the information being communicated. Whether a literal picture, or an arrangement of abstract concepts, your brain will do the necessary work if you stay focused and alert.
Step 5: Do not interrupt and do not impose your “solutions.”
We all think and speak at different rates. If you are a quick thinker and an agile talker, the burden is on you to relax your pace for the slower, more thoughtful communicator.
Step 6: Wait for the speaker to pause to ask clarifying questions.
When you do not understand something, of course you should ask the speaker to explain it to you. Rather than interrupt, wait until the speaker pauses. Then say something like, “Back up a second. I didn’t understand what you just said about…”
Step 7: Ask questions only to ensure understanding.
Keep the conversation on track. To “hijack” the speaker’s thoughts and intentions will only frustrate them from obtaining their communication goals. When you notice that your question has led the speaker astray, take responsibility for getting the conversation back on track.
Step 8: Try to feel what the speaker is feeling.
Empathy is the heart and soul of good listening. To experience empathy, you have to put yourself in the other person’s place. This is not an easy thing to do. It takes energy and concentration.
Step 9: Give the speaker regular feedback.
The idea is to give the speaker some proof that you are listening, and that you are following their train of thought
Step 10: Pay attention to nonverbal cues.
We glean a great deal of information about each other without saying a word. Even over the telephone, you can learn almost as much about a person from the tone and cadence of their voice. Face to face with a person, you can detect enthusiasm, boredom, or irritation very quickly in their non-verbal cues.
The Goal of effective listening is to come away from the conversation better informed that you started. Quality listening will improve outcomes, reduce errors and engage your speaker. This does take work, but the return on results is great.
Enjoy you conversations!