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Communication is easy.  All you need to do is say what you mean and mean what you say. Right!  How many of us are able to truly do that?  And, when we finally do say what we intend to say, why is it that the people we say it to are not always happy to hear our words?

Whether we want to believe it or not, there definitely is an art to communicating effectively.  First, of course, we need to really know what we think, feel, believe, and want to communicate to others.  Right here, many of us run into problems.  We may have some idea about what needs to be said, but we may not be clear about how we feel and we may have no idea how the other person or persons might respond.  So, first, we have to gain clarity about our own thoughts, ideas, needs, desires, beliefs and intentions. 

Next, it is important for us to know who we are communicating with.  How does this person tend to receive and interpret information? Do they often  have a knee-jerk defensiveness, either automatically assuming the other person is out to get them or they are personally defective?  Do they usually smile and appear to cooperate but secretly gossip, complain or sabotoge?  Are they genuinely able to hear what you have to say and able to interpret the meaning pretty much the way you meant it?  Are they thick skinned, so that you can freely say what you think without worrying about offending them or are they super-sensitive, requiring careful consideration lest you insult their sensibilities.

Third, once you are clear about what you truly want to communicate and you are also clear about the receptivity style and capability of the other person or persons, then it is imperative for you to tailor your own style of communication to match their ability to listen, hear and comprehend your words.  In other words, you need to communicate in a language style that bypasses their defensiveness, insecurity or other possible reactions.

If you are not currently communicating with ease, why not?  Find out by taking a brief course or reading some readily available information.

 





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Nathan Tierney

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Brad Warren

Castro Valley, CA

Dr. Sydney Metrick

El Sobrante, CA

Edward Taylor

Columbus, OH

Dr. Rick Bommelje (BOMB-L-J)

Orlando, FL

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